The European Parliament, it seems, has run out of policy responses to the debt crisis.

Bailout funds, sovereign debt relief, and euro reform efforts appear to have been exhausted, leaving MEPs putting their heads between their legs and hoping for the best.

Under the rubric of what the parliament laughingly calls 'news' on its website, its inaugural headline of 2012 is a 'New Year's Wish for a successful resolution of the Euro crisis.'

'Monster looks forward to this setting a trend in EU decision-making:

'EU to ban black cats'

'Brussels announces safety measures to prevent walking under ladders'

'Barnier's rabbit's foot to trigger banking-sector stability'

To play us out, it's the Everly Brothers' overlooked ballad, 'Wishing Won't Make It So'

Good luck for 2012...


'You wake one day
To clouds of grey
The rain it soon appears
You close your eyes
Try to visualise
A day that's bright and clear


But wishing won't make it so
I proved it long ago'